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When a menopausal man changes wife, his wife falls usually into one of two categories. Either she is young and attractive or she is ambitious with a strong personality.

Younger wives are usually sexy, probably more than ten years younger than the husband. Apart from a revived sex life they bring him the chance of being reborn, a young family, renewed pride (at having the young wife) and, as important, a wife who will cushion his life as she looks after him.

Strong wives are wives with push, ambition and loads of personality. Often they are highly attractive too. There may be little age difference between husband and wife and these are wives who see the unfulfilled potential of the husband’s work and so inject into him the extra ambition he needs to get ahead, for more goals in life. They are supportive and whenever they can will try to further his career and promotion by participating in the social aspects of his worklife.

Once an M-M man has decided on packing his bags and leaving the marital home — he is the one who leaves — there is not much a wife can do. The options are in his hands.

Should she love him still and want him back, or, as is likely, she wants him back if only to make him face up to his responsibilities (like bringing up the children), the only course is to hope he comes to his senses and returns. Any action she takes is likely to alienate him further and disturb her even more.

If the marriage is stale and she does not mind him leaving, probably on the terms she dictates, then once the recriminations are over a friendship can be made out of the debris.

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